


Til Death or Whatever Comes After

by butterflyslinky



Category: That Guy with the Glasses/Channel Awesome
Genre: F/M, M/M, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-03
Updated: 2014-05-03
Packaged: 2018-01-21 18:28:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1559894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflyslinky/pseuds/butterflyslinky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Can we have something with this please, Maven kidnaps Paw to be her vampire bride and Linkara is his boyfriend coming to his rescue and battles Maven of the Eventide for him and then its end with them kissing romantically? As much as I love Linkara/Spoony, this new pairing idea of Linkara/Paw is too good not to pass up. :)”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Til Death or Whatever Comes After

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Wedding Week at TGWTG fic. It is intended to be silly and I wish Paul and Elisa all the best.

Paw knew something was the wrong the moment he woke up. He wasn’t at home in bed, warm in his fiancée’s embrace where he had gone to sleep. It was far too cold, the surface he was lying on was far too hard, and there was no strong, warm arm wrapped around him.

He opened his eyes. He was lying on the ground outside, the full moon shining down on him. He looked around and saw that he was in the cemetery, lying at the feet of an enormous stone angel and…

He was dressed in a suit. That was definitely weird. Not because he hadn’t gone to sleep in a suit, but because it meant that whoever had brought him here had had the time to change his clothes and not wake him.

“So,” a deep, accented voice suddenly said. “You have awoken, my bride!” Paw turned his head and saw a tall, blond woman in a black dress standing before him. She had deep red lips and was wearing way too much eye shadow, and Paw quickly racked him brain to remember who she was.

“Hi,” he said, not really sure what he was supposed to say. “Maven, right?”

“Yes,” she said. “I am ze Maven of ze Eventide, and I have brought you here to be my vampire bride!”

“Bride?” Paw repeated in confusion.

“Yes!” She stepped forward and took his hand, pulling him to his feet. “My bride for all eternity!”

“Um, I’m flattered,” Paw said. “But number one, I’d be your groom since I’m, you know, a guy, and second, I’m engaged. To Linkara.”

Maven rolled her eyes. “You will be my bride!” she declared dramatically. “And no one will come between us! Now, come! They’re waiting!”

She pulled Paw through the cemetery, which seemed darker and creepier than usual. As they passed the graves, Paw swore he could hear whispers and laughter coming from them, and as they drew closer to the mausoleum at the center, the whispers grew more distinct.

“The vampire’s bride. Isn’t he beautiful?”

“She must turn him before the rooster crows, though.”

“She shall. None can save him but true love, and that is too far away.”

Paw shivered, suddenly cold. He was going to be trapped, forever bound to this crazy vampire girl. He would never see Linkara again…

Maven didn’t notice the tears starting to fall down Paw’s cheeks as they finally reached the mausoleum, where a pale figure stood waiting.

“It this your bride?” the figure asked in a harsh whispered.

“He is,” Maven confirmed.

“Do you have the rings?”

“Of course,” Maven said with a laugh, producing them.

“Very well. Let us begin.”

There was a sudden creaking and shifting as the grave all around broke open and the occupants appeared, skeletons grinning widely. Paw tried to scream at the sight, but he couldn’t quite manage it as the dead took their places all around, a grim, ghostly audience. Maven squeezed his hand. “Relax, darling,” she whispered. “They’re just a few friends to welcome you into their ranks.”

“But you’re a vampire,” he whimpered. “You’re still technically alive…”

“I am mostly dead,” she said and then she turned back to the pale figure. “Proceed.”

“Dearly Departed, we are gathered here today in the presence of these witnesses, to join The Maven of the Eventide and Paw Dugan in matrimony commended to be honorable among all; and therefore is not to be entered into lightly but reverently, passionately, lovingly and solemnly. Into this - these two persons present now come to be joined. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together - let them speak now or forever hold their peace.”

“I can show cause!” called a voice from the back of the assembly.

Paw turned in relief as Linkara strode through the rows of the dead, Magic Gun in hand, fury on his face. “That man is engaged to me!” Linkara said, stopping before the ghostly priest. “And I will fight anyone who tries to take him away!”

The assembly of the dead glanced at each other. The ghostly minister looked between Linkara and Maven, who glared furiously at Linkara.

“Very well!” Maven proclaimed. “If you wish to challenge me, I will accept it! A fight to the end for his hand!”

“Choose your weapon!” Linkara said. “And we will battle!”

“Fine!” Maven ran into the mausoleum for a moment and returned with two swords. “Clear the area!” she called. “We will finish this now!”

Linkara took one of the swords and looked at Paw. “Do not fear, my love,” he said quietly. “I will save you!”

“I wouldn’t be so confident!” Maven said as two of the skeletons grabbed Paw’s arms and dragged him back, clearing a large space for Maven and Linkara to battle.

“Begin,” the ghostly minister said as soon as there was sufficient room.

The swords met with a clash. Linkara pulled back first and attacked again, but Maven blocked his sword with ease. They circled around each other, both looking for an opening. Maven charged, swinging her sword, and Linkara blocked her before swinging around quickly, hoping to take her off guard, but she countered the blow easily.

It continued this way for quite a while, their swords meeting furiously but neither able to gain the upper hand. Paw had to admit that he was impressed, not that Maven could match Linkara, but that she could do it in a dress and heels. Paw couldn’t help but feel a little worried, though. If Linkara lost…

The battle raged on for a good hour, the swords clashing harder with every attack and counter-attack. Paw grew more and more anxious as time went on. Maven didn’t seem to be tiring—if anything, she seemed to grow more energized the longer they fought—but Linkara’s breath was growing short and his blows seemed weaker with every passing minute. If this didn’t end soon, Paw was afraid that Linkara would collapse from pure physical exhaustion.

The end came a little before one AM. Maven finally saw an opening and lunged, knocking Linkara’s sword aside and leaving a superficial cut on his chest. Linkara managed to block her before she could do any more damage and he lunged desperately toward her. The blow was just strong enough to knock her sword from her hand. She fell to the ground and found Linkara’s sword at her throat.

“Give up,” Linkara panted.

Maven looked like she was about to argue, but the ghostly minister called, “He has won! It is over.”

The rest of the assembly agreed, their thin, ghostly voices calling for Maven to surrender Paw to Linkara.

“Very well,” she finally sighed. “Take him!”

Linkara dropped his sword and rushed to Paw’s side, pulling him into a tight embrace. “Paw!” he gasped. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Paw said, hugging Linkara back. “I’m fine…and I’m so glad you made it…how did you know where I was?”

Linkara smiled at him. “I’ll always find you,” he whispered. “After all, I love you.” He smiled. “You look wonderful, though.”

“So do you,” Paw said with a laugh. “As usual.”

The ghostly minister coughed. “Wedding’s off,” he said to the assembled dead. “You might as well go back to sleep.”

“Says who?” Linkara asked, still smiling. “There’s just a new couple.”

The assembly exchanged glances. Maven finally broke the silence. “Why not?” she asked. “I’ll even be your maid of honor if you want.”

“All right,” Paw agreed. Five minutes later, he and Linkara were standing before the assembly, listening to the drone of the wedding ceremony. Maven slipped the rings to Linkara. Somehow, they managed to change size to fit the new couple as they slid them onto each other’s fingers. Paw couldn’t really remember saying his vows, but before he knew it, the ghostly minister had pronounced them bonded. He saw Linkara, his Linkara, his strong, beautiful Linkara…

“You may now kiss the bride.”

Linkara’s arms were around him, strong and warm, and they kissed under the full moon light, oblivious to everything but each other and the love that would challenge anything that came between them.


End file.
